Crazy Love- Initial thoughts and prayers

When I first started into this book, my thoughts were simple. "I love listening to Francis Chan. Everybody is recommending this book. I've probably heard this stuff before."

But as I dug into chapter 1 my prayer began. "Show me something new! Open my callus heart. Bring back my amazement in You."

I am aware of how big our God is. I do have faith in the things unseen. But the idea of spiritual amnesia hit home. All too often I forget my place, and God's in all this. I know it in my heart, but my head forgets. I get caught up in the day to day and allow myself to forget that God is in control. He knows all things, and that I am in His hands. The idea is humbling and yet still hard to remember. I tend to forget who God is most at school. Dealing daily with disrespectful, irresponsible, dishonest, sinful students makes it hard to remember that God is in control of all things, and even lives in the hearts of some of these students.

I am setting a goal for myself. "My school is my mission field. I will try to be Christ to my students, coworkers, and bosses." This will be hard. Coworkers can be as difficult as students and the pressure to whine and complain is an easy one to give in to if I am not careful. Just the same, my bosses tear me down, and rarely encourage me. Seldom am I praised for any good work. But why should I expect praise? I need to remind myself to avoid sinful pride. I must become less so that He will become greater. I should work as if I were working for the Lord. Because I am. I should do my best, work my hardest, at everything I do. I am an example of Christ. I need to live that out.

I've got a long way to go...